What's "Up Chuck"?

Howdy folks, this is Julie, a.k.a. QoP, guest bloggin' for my buddy Chuck. He asked me to post something special for him this week while he's gone in Canada, on vacation. You all will be happy to know that they made it there safe and sound. The pics are gorgeous. Absolutely stunning and make me so fricken jealous (HA! see Chuck? I told you I wouldn't say fuck on your blog) that I can hardly see straight. I have an affinity for snow, and seeing as I live in Texas where we NEVER get any, I'm green with envy. The main reason for my blogging today is that I needed to fill you all in on something. You see, Chuck is my best friend, and after a long discussion, he came to a decision. He's been wrestling with this a very long time and wasn't really sure how to tell all of you. So I stepped up to the proverbial plate, and will now begin to tell you what Chuck & Susan are really doing in Canada. In case some of you read blogs standing up, now would be a good time to pull up a chair, get comfy, maybe even grab a mug of hot cocoa. But not too hot though, because if you spill it while reading the news, it will burn and hurt. And I can't be responsible for that, mkay? Ready? Ok, here goes. It all started 25 years ago. Chuck (or young Charles, whichever you prefer) began to acknowledge that there was something a little different about him. He wasn't quite like all the other boys. Over the years he'd seen them in locker rooms, backstage at all his numerous musical productions, jail, etc. He knew that they all had something he didn't. And he was consumed with jealousy. Intense burning, raging jealousy. You see, Chuck has no body hair. WAIT JUST A MINUTE QoP!! We've seen pics, I can hear you all shouting at your monitors right now. Folks, the truth must come out. Those are body toupees. Fakes. Phonies. A ruse. And for years they were enough to do the trick. Until one day a friend (who shall remain nameless, *cough cough*) talked our boy Chuck into admitting his problem and striving for his lifelong dream. Going to the Canadian Institute of Body Hair Transplants (CIBHT). Sure he SAYS they are there for vacation, but really? Not so much. The CIBHT is a frontrunner in body hair transplant technology. They have all the good doctors. They are very reputable, and after months of saving up their pennies, Chuck & Susan have gone North to fulfill his lifelong dream. And I applaud him. And wish him luck in his hairy endeavors. God Speed Chuck, may you come home hairy and happy. Maybe the nightmares will finally end. We all love you buddy and wish you a speedy recovery! ;-)